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How I Weird: David W Barbee

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Today we get the very special privilege of talking to not only the Editor-In-Cheef of BizarroCentral.Com, not only one of the great bizarro authors of our time, not only the Grandmaster Toad-Licker himself, but the man who was just this morning crowned THE SEXIEST MAN IN FRANCE 2019. And he’s […]

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How I Weird: Ben Fitts

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Point your guzzler to the sky, howl at the moon, and say his name thrice. That’s how one summons the spooky zinester from New York, Ben Fitts.  Either that or slide into his DM’s, all slick-like.  Ben might look sanitary from a safe distance, but believe me, he’s absolutely filthy. […]

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New Release: Thong of Thongs

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From Deep Desires Press comes this debut collection from Kitty Knish. If you’re looking for the best author of Jewish erotica, your prayers have been answered. Equal parts Kosher and raunchy, Knish invites you to come explore sex and love the oy vey way. “Verdict: Thong of Thongs: 69 Sexy […]

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Wonderland Book Award Preliminary Voting Begins Now

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The Wonderland Book Awards are a recognition presented annually at BizarroCon for superior achievement in bizarro fiction writing. Voting for the Wonderland Book Award preliminary ballot begins now for the Best Bizarro Novel and Best Bizarro Collection of 2018. Below is a list of all eligible titles. Please send your […]

Flash Fiction Friday: Hello, Snööp

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By: Douglas Hackle The ’70 Plymouth Barracuda was already doing a steady 95 MPH down I-90, causing the ’cuda’s shotgun-riding passenger—a lamplighter by trade—to grip the dashboard with a white-knuckled hand, dig his shoes into the floor, and press his back hard into his seat, his forehead slick with terror-sweat. […]

Flash Fiction Friday: THE MAN WHO WENT TO WAR AND LOST HIS GUN BUT STILL COULD KILL WITH HIS BAYONET AND TOOK OUT A PLATOON BEFORE GETTING HIS DICK SHOT OFF AND STILL MANAGED TO FIGHT AND KILL AND MAIM UNTIL HE BUILT A ROBOT COCK AND FUCKED HITLER TO DEATH IN HIS BUNKER WHILE EVA BRAUN DIED OF FRIGHT AND THE POOR DOG GOT TO LIVE INSTEAD OF BEING KILLED AND HE TURNED HIS ROBOT COCK INTO A CHAINSAW LIKE ASH IN EVIL DEAD SO HE COULD DESTROY ZOMBIES WHO USED TO BE NAZI SOLDIERS WHO BECAME COMMUNISTS WHEN THEY DIED AND TRIED TO MARCH ON BRITAIN TO CONQUER CHURCHILL AND TURN HIM INTO A BOOZED-UP WEREWOLF BUT THE MAN REKILLED THEM AND WENT TO JAPAN WHERE HE KILLED HIS WAY THROUGH HIROSHIMA AND NAGASAKI AND THE US GOVERNMENT INVENTED ATOMIC BOMBS TO COVER UP THE HORRIBLE MASSACRES AND WHEN HE WON THE WAR HE WENT HOME AND TRIED NOT TO KILL ANYONE WITH HIS CHAINSAW DICK BUT FAILED MISERABLY AND HAD TO SERVE OUT A LIFE SENTENCE BUT HE KILLED EVERYONE IN PRISON SO THEY SENT HIM TO KOREA WHERE HE FOUGHT A T-REX AND BEAT IT TO DEATH WITH HIS BARE HANDS BUT THE COMMIES FROZE HIM IN CARBONITE AND BURIED HIM FOR DECADES UNTIL KIM JONG UN ACCIDENTALLY UNFROZE HIM AND THE MAN KILLED EVERYONE AND WENT HOME TO DISCOVER THE NEW PRESIDENT WAS A TRAITOR SO HE KILLED HIM AND EVERYONE AROUND HIM AND INSTALLED TOM HANKS AS PRESIDENT SO HE COULD RETIRE TO FLORIDA WHERE HE CLEANED THE STATE UP AND FED ALL THE ASSHOLES TO ALLIGATORS AND LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER

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By: John Bruni The end. _____ John Bruni is the author of BLOOD, DONG OF FRANKENSTEIN and POOR BASTARDS AND RICH FUCKS. He lives in Elmhurst, IL, where he spends waaaaaaaay too much time thinking about weird shit for a guy who doesn’t smoke weed.

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How I Weird: Michael Allen Rose

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Michael Allen Rose appeared to me in a dream last night. Naked? Absolutely! He popped his eyeballs out of his head and suggested we trade but I was like, “but I like my eyes, thanks,” and he proceeded to howl at me with such a punishingly sweet vibrato that I […]

WTFriday: Nathan Carson

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WTFridays will bring you the most bizarre moments from a variety of bizarro books, the moments that make you look up from the page and say, “WTF?” So dig into this week’s offering, provided, for your enjoyment, completely without context. _____ Puppy had driven into the little town of Monroe […]

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How I Weird: Gerald Dean Rice

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Gerald Dean Rice is an enigma. Some say he is a demonic creature from another dimension that climbed out of a birthday cake. “Surprise!” he said, before melting the birthday girl, friends, and parents, with his famous exploding striptease. Some say he’s more than that, a dream that thought it […]

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Available for Pre-Order: Thong of Thongs

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Thong of Thongs is the lovely Kitty Knish’s debut collection of 69 sexy Jewish stories, showcasing Jewish humor at its finest. Equal parts kosher and dirty, romantic and raunchy fun. Adam, Eve and the trouser snake; streaking at a kibbutz; Freud’s introduction to submission; these are only a few of […]

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Bizarro Summer Reading: Laser House on the Prairie

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Wherein Bizarro Central takes a wide-ranging look at all the weird books coming out this summer… “David W Barbee is a genre of one, much like Joe R. Lansdale, Weston Ochse, and Elmore Leonard. Possessing a strong, unique voice that blends the best elements of bizarro, horror, action, and humor, […]

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Bizarro Summer Reading: Scum of the Earth

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Wherein Bizarro Central takes a wide-ranging look at all the weird books coming out this summer… THEY CAME TO RAID… THEY STAYED TO GET LAID! For centuries, alien drug-runners plundered the Earth, harvesting organs and freebasing fear. Few drugs could match the potency of humanity’s dysfunctional two-stroke brains, so the […]

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Bizarro Summer Reading: Impossible James

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Wherein Bizarro Central takes a wide-ranging look at all the weird books coming out this summer… My father was dying. There was no hope. Then he took a screwdriver to the brain. Got pregnant. And found the cure for death. Impossible? That’s my dad. IMPOSSIBLE JAMES “Danger Slater is fearless […]

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Bizarro Summer Reading: Everybody Lies in Hell

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Wherein Bizarro Central features a wide-ranging look at all the weird books coming out this summe… “In Everybody Lies in Hell Mike Stone’s eternal damnation is a private detective’s office in a re-imagined Brooklyn. In Hell, the beautiful woman with a case opens a literal Pandora’s Box, and Stone is […]

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Bizarro Summer Reading: Cannibal Nuns from Outer Space

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Wherein Bizarro Central features a wide-ranging look at all the weird books coming out this summer… The summer blockbuster book! Probably. With an encyclopaedic knowledge of cake, and exclusive access to the church’s stockpile of holy weapons, the Order of the Crimson Rosary are on the frontline in the eternal […]

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Bizarro Summer Reading: The Drive-Thru Crematorium

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Wherein Bizarro Central features a wide-ranging look at all the weird books coming out this summer… “Bassoff confronts directly the traumatic stress disorder of our world today and tears off its mask, even if the face must follow.” – New York Magazine “Toss Kafka, David Lynch, and a pinch of […]

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Bizarro Summer Reading: One for the Road

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Wherein Bizarro Central features a wide-ranging look at all the weird books coming out this summer… “A road trip through Hell in the spirit of Skipp & Spector’s The Scream and Grady Hendrix’s We Sold Our Souls. I loved it!” –Brian Keene, author of The Rising “A gritty and authentic rampage […]

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Bizarro Summer Reading: The Story of the Y

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Wherein Bizarro Central features a wide-ranging look at all the weird books coming out this summer… “The Story of the Y… is the love child of Carlos Fuentes and Hunter S. Thompson, covered in blood and desert dust, screaming outside a Mexican restaurant. Listen to it.” – Gabino Iglesias, Author of […]

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Bizarro Summer Reading: Dirty Rotten Hippies and Other Stories

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Wherein Bizarro Central takes a wide-ranging look at all the weird books coming out this summer… They’ve come from all over the world for a three-day celebration of peace, music, and groovy vibes. Then a mystery drug sickens thousands and the dead begin to rise in Dirty Rotten Hippies, the […]

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Bizarro Summer Reading: I’m Not Even Supposed to Be Here Today

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Wherein Bizarro Central features a wide-ranging look at all the weird books coming out this summer… “Sometimes you stop by the convenience store for a slushy and the world just goes straight to hell, and takes you along with it. I haven’t had this much fun watching terrible stuff happen in […]

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Bizarro Summer Reading: Unamerica

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Wherein Bizarro Central features a wide-ranging look at all the weird books coming out this summer… “Cody Goodfellow knows how to chill your blood. . .” —STEPHEN KING, author of It and The Dark Half #thisisunamerica NEVER WORK, NEVER DIE Buried half a mile beneath the desert sands of the US-Mexico border, exists […]

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Bizarro Summer Reading: Lakehouse Infernal

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Wherein Bizarro Central features a wide-ranging look at all the weird books coming out this summer… “Lakehouse Infernal is the coolest, ball-bustingest, most outrageous, and most ENTERTAINING horror novel you’re likely to find in a long time.” – Edward Lee author of City Infernal Lake Misquamicus was an unremarkable lake in […]

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Bizarro Summer Reading: Mouse Trap

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Wherein Bizarro Central features a wide-ranging look at all the weird books coming out this summer… For almost 20 years, Carlton Mellick III has been writing some of the strangest and most compelling novels the bizarro fiction genre has to offer. Described as one of the top 40 science-fiction writers […]