Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-A-Fit-In-Acts

Flash Fiction Friday: A Fit In Acts

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by Chris Meekings The curtain opens. The fairies in the audience rustle restless in their seats. They eat sticks of marzipan, noisily. Lights up. Enter an announcer. He’s dressed in a full black suit. His hair is immaculate and plastered down to his skull with soup. “Ladies and gentlemen,” he […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-Talk-Nice-to-Me

Flash Fiction Friday: Talk Nice to Me

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by Eric LaRocca The soles of his custom-made patent leather Oxfords click anxiously on the tiled floor of the doctor’s exam room. Jonathan McCoy can scarcely contain his delight. His hand rests on his wife’s thigh as he sits beside her, rubbing her leg, his fingers occasionally harassing the hem […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-Inflate

Flash Fiction Friday: Inflate

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by Frank J. Edler To dream that you are inflating something represents intellect, awareness, knowledge and a higher power. Alternatively, it may symbolize your inflated ego or inflated sense of self. The yogi cradled my lifeless vessel in his arms. He was gentle and caring like a guardian; tender and […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-I-Lost-My-Keys-and-Got-Crabs

Flash Fiction Friday: I Lost My Keys and Got Crabs

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by John Wayne Comunale I lost my keys after I slept in a bed cursed by an Inuit witch doctor and woke up with what looked like giant snow-crabs dangling from my balls. I figured the reason I got snow-crabs was because my dazzlingly white pubes sparkled like the light […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-Loving-Hands-of-Professionals

Flash Fiction Friday: Loving Hands of Professionals

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by Julia Long There was a little it inside of Shem’s chest cavity.A pine cone, in his chest cavity.A disgusting little pine cone.The little chest pine cone was made of nubile naked skin.The little skin pine cone in Shem’s heart caught hellfire.It. Shem was taking a creepy bath. A lot […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-House-of-a-Million-Sorrows

Flash Fiction Friday: House of a Million Sorrows

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by Shawn Milazzo In public, we wear masks. I’m walking the dense roads of society. The world around me only becomes more populated. They removed our faces, our personalities. It is unknown to us who they are. All we know is they came to our planet, many years ago. They came from […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-The-Ghouldiggers-Daughter

Flash Fiction Friday: The Ghouldigger’s Daughter

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by Nicholaus Patnaude Lorna clicked on the link in the anonymous email directing her to Juglicious.com and fought back the urge to vomit – Gerald had promised never to show the photos to anyone, unless their exposure would help give clues to the whereabouts of her missing daughter, Hannah. Somebody […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-They-Dont-Serve-Ice-Cream-in-Hell

Flash Fiction Friday: They Don’t Serve Ice Cream in Hell

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by John Wayne Comunale “Your suffering will be legendary . . . if you eat this and happen to be lactose intolerant.” The child, not more than four years old, stared up blank-faced at the former Cenobite as he added the third and final scoop of fudge-ripple to a large […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-A-Phone-Call-from-Ionesco

Flash Fiction Friday: A Phone Call from Ionesco

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by G. Arthur Brown ACT I (An average family American 1960 sits at an average family table for an average dinner. Eugene Ionesco is not among them. FATHER sits at one side of the table dressed like an American father 1960. MOTHER sits at another side of the table dressed […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-Titles-Are-Pointless

Flash Fiction Friday: Titles Are Pointless

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by Pedro Proença There is a problem with language. In itself, it’s just a way of communicating uselessness. What we are are mere specks of something on a big beach. The beach is connected to a desert, and beyond that, we can’t even imagine. Once I swallowed a car. It […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-Professor-Sex

Flash Fiction Friday: Professor Sex

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by Scott Unfried Garda Ruth O’Gruagain, stood reticent and radiant, at the edge of a cliff overlooking the calm waters. She was not an ordinary officer, her skin clearer than most, her eyebrows more pleasingly plucked, her brown hair shinier, and brown eyes that made a beautifully beefy gaze. Those […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-Dragon-Queen

Flash Fiction Friday: Dragon Queen

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by Cade Michael Quinn Chucky was a dragon. A big, scary dragon. That’s what Momma told him. “Am I big ‘n’ scary?” Chuck asked Momma. He stretched his wings and dug his claws into the wood-panel floor and growled as big as he could. “Am I big ‘n’ scary, Momma?” […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-An-Alphabetical-List-of-Every-Woman-Ive-Ever-Slept-With

Flash Fiction Friday: An Alphabetical List of Every Woman I’ve Ever Slept With

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by Danger Slater #1: (Actually, before I get started on this list, I just wanted to make it clear that I in no way mean any disrespect to the women on it.) #1: (Really, though. I mean that. I am an affectionate man with a gentle touch and a sensitive […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-The-Mustache-Growing-Competition

Flash Fiction Friday: The Mustache Growing Competition

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by Bradley Sands a deleted scene from Dodgeball High, available ONLY on the Belgian import PRINCIPAL’S OFFICE I go in, and Burt Reynolds says, “Hey, there, little fella. Ha ha ha ha!” This is so not fair! Why isn’t Principal Tug in his office? Principal offices are for principals, not guys who […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-Martian-Funeral

Flash Fiction Friday: Martian Funeral

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by Craig A. Buckley The good Rev. Johnny Elwood loosened his tie. His black Sunday jacket lay draped over the chair behind his desk. His wife would have been in a tizzy if she’d seen it. That’s what hangers were invented for, Johnny, she’d say, to keep out the wrinkles. […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-The-Case-of-the-Already-Solved-Case

Flash Fiction Friday: The Case of the Already-Solved Case

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by Douglas Hackle When Mrs. Eleanor Henderson called upon me—Douglas Hackle, Licensed Private Investigator—to solve the case of her husband’s murder, the case had been closed for over three years. On June 4, 2009, Mrs. Henderson’s husband, Gregory, was killed by a chainsaw-wielding maniac named Dizzy-o Parcheezy on a busy […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-Super-Fun-Dance-Time

Flash Fiction Friday: Super Fun Dance Time

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by Brian Auspice Hamstring lies in a hospital bed. Tubes feed out of his right arm into a large 1970’s mainframe computer. He watches his blood slowly get sucked through the plastic. The computer beeps. A nurse walks in. She places a stereo on a nearby table. “The doctor will […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-Unauthorized-Biography

Flash Fiction Friday: Unauthorized Biography

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by Eric Hendrixson Even as a child he was like that. In school, during the class on fractions, he told the nun she was a liar and refused to listen. He was suspended for a week. He said, “You can’t have anything part-way.” When October came, he dressed up like […]

Bizarro-Field-Trip - House-on-the-Rock

Bizarro Field Trip with Eric Hendrixson: Pt II

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Missed Part One? Never fear! Click HERE to catch up! The House on the Rock is an architectural anomaly, a spectacle, an autobiography in clutter, and a museum of hoarding. It holds vast, unrelated collections of of artifacts, some of them authentic. It is said to be the most popular tourist destination […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-Amnesia-Bug-credit-Paul-van-de-Velde

Flash Fiction Friday: Amnesia Bug

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by Jeremy Maddux It was about midday when all the commotion started out on Brightway Boulevard. A man in pinstripe business attire was coming back from lunch with the routine sugar buzz of his franchised coffee kicking in when he noticed something on the ground. He went to his knees […]

Bizarro-Field-Trip - Don-Q-Inn

Bizarro Field Trip with Eric Hendrixson: Pt I

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As midnight approached, we were far from the highway, on the kind of country road that starts a third of the horror films made in the ’80s. That’s when the GPS signal dropped out. My wife hadn’t told me where we were going. When we decided to take a trip, […]

Featured-Images - Featured-News

Flash Fiction Friday: This Page Is Intentionally Left Blank

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That’s right. No FFF this week. We here at Bizarro Central are in dire need of content! If you have a bizarro story, 2000 words or less, attach it as a .doc or .rtf and send it to garthurbrown@hotmail.com. Please include a brief, single paragraph bio. Here’s a fun gif:

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-Three-Shorts-from-Mario-Z.-Nemes

Flash Fiction Friday: Three Shorts from Márió Z. Nemes

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by Márió Z. Nemes. Translated by Zoltán Komor Red Water In the village of the dwarfs everyone’s about four inches long. They shoot the ones who grow taller, keeping a gun around just for this purpose. The dwarfs call it Mother’s anger, but they also like to use the saw. […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-The-Bloody-Pustule-Beauty-Pageant

Flash Fiction Friday: The Bloody Pustule Beauty Pageant

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by Bob Freville They’re spilling out on to the rickety termite-ridden runway. Woo daddy! We can see them lumbering out now! Oh yes! Those adorable little gals! Our bright shining stars of the tomorrows that may never come! Yep, ladies and gentlemen! They’re a sight for sore, empty eye sockets […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-Booger-Sugar

Flash Fiction Friday: Booger Sugar

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by Bob Freville He always loved to sniff things, to whiff things. He always dug fresh smells. His first olfactory hallucination occurred in puberty. He got it bad after graduation. Bands of cilia saturated in what looked like rotting corpses but smelled like strips of cotton candy. Years had passed […]

Flash-Fiction-Friday - FF-Rattled-by-the-Rush

Flash Fiction Friday: Rattled by the Rush (Excerpt)

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by Chris Kelso 233, I take time over the stress of every word. Do you like to write? You like to read though…right? To be an artist is to suffer. The deliria can be rather disorientating, so I decide to connect the rooms in my house with lines of taut […]