The cult section of the literary world
by Avichai Brautigam There is a fly drowning in a puddle of honey on my kitchen table. Why? Because, with full knowledge of what would come of it, I left the golden brown for the catching of flies like this one. Alas, I think my fly… my prisoner… is dying. […]
by James Burr “You, sir, have spilled my pint!” All eyes in the pub turned at the sound of breaking glass, a pool of foaming ale rapidly spreading out at the feet of the furious Academic. The Professor eyed his accuser angrily. “And I contend that I did not spill […]
by Brian Auspice I flip a switch and turn off friction. I slide into a wall. The wall slides into me. Everything and everyone slides into everything and everyone else. We all get a good laugh out of it. I flip the switch again and begin to untangle the mess […]
by Bert Stanton Totino’s Party Pizza is anything but a party or a pizza. It’s a square of questionable food stuffs; dough, cheese and meat in name only. The reality is ingredients manufactured in the basement of a North Korean sweatshop. At a dollar a pop, you really can’t expect […]
by Nathan W. Taynthoemer One sun-brewed Monday in July, there was a monkey. He was incredibly drunk. For no real reason at all, the monkey bellowed “Fuck you, God!” toward the heavens at an ear-bleeding volume. The monkey god didn’t take too kindly to this, so he summoned a plague […]
by Goathead Buckley His ratman-hair overcoat let him live on the cold streets beneath the levitating, blue pyramid. The monstrosity had appeared one quiet afternoon to the north and steadily hovered closer until, by dinnertime, the entire city lay in its shadow. Humans threw themselves out of windows and into […]
by Rick Sherman DO YOU. As one of many concubines you will want to stand out. The Tah-Lahki have no concept of masturbation. Diddling yourself creatively is a sure way to attract his/her attention and assure you of an extra ration to help put off starvation for another day. PULL […]
by John Wayne Comunale Kyle shut the window, closed the drapes, and made his decision. The ratings had been shit for years, despite it being the longest running show in history. He was the President of Television, and tough decisions like this were his responsibility. He was going to have […]
by: Raf De Bie Last week, I asked Cynthia to marry me. Today, the mailman hands me her reply: an empty piece of paper and a plastic bag stuffed with vowels, consonants, and punctuation marks. The mailman pats me on the back. “Sorry fella, they must have fallen off. It […]
by: Bob Durant Courtney Love tried to suck me off once. No joke. Five years ago, backstage at a Matchbox 20 concert, behind the speaker cases behind the sound booth. She dropped to her knees right there, started grabbing for my fun zone. She was sober, and it was weird. I […]
by: Andrew Novak The people see me dance and they can’t believe. They compliment my wooden mask, its bright saffron and blackened stripes. They stare into my reflective eyes and touch my mouth lined with rotting teeth of creature. Only, it’s no mask. It’s my face. It’s real. And the people, […]
Editor’s note: In honor of the season and as a public service, we are departing from FFF’s usual narrative format to bring you this eggnog recipe. by Frank Edler It’s Christmastime again. A time of joy, love, warmth, giving and all that nonsense. What Christmastime really is all about is that […]
by G. J. Hart A few moments after the bullet gathers up your heart and scarpers, Jennifer demands you play golf. You must refuse. You haven’t played in years, and your knees will seize like the shears buried that night the moon whistled and kicked the ground. As she swings […]
by Nimrod Tzarking The walls are white, immense. A void. Gauzy specs wiggle in the air, wrinkles in the eye revealing flaws in the infinite, giving way to ghosts. The ghosts live in the electric. The electric lives in the walls. The walls are throbbing with crazed ectoplasm. How much […]
By J. Peter W. “Dude, Are you getting up?” Alex asked, standing impatiently at the doorway. I looked at him and shrugged. “I can’t.” “What do you mean?” “It’s my knees. They quit on me.” I pulled back the blanket and revealed the blasted things. They both squinted in the […]
By John Wayne Comunale Carrie peered through the curtains of her bedroom window. The man was still there. She didn’t know why she expected anything different, since he had been standing on the sidewalk across the street from her house for the last five days. Every time she looked out, […]
by Madeleine Swann Jesse lived a little way out of the city, so Ellen had told her husband that she was getting a pedicure. He would have denounced the whole thing and checked further into her spending. The room was so ordinary that Ellen was disappointed. Jesse took her fur coat […]
by Goathead Buckley Stow your remaining fingers, fleshmen! Keep them warm and full of blood! There is work to be done. The battle is won, yet the war is far from over. Even now as we celebrate with hoot whistles and drug liquor, the mechanical menace of the Cyberoboticists rebuilds […]
by Alex S. Johnson For Chris Ropes For a long time, I failed to grasp the significance, the true import, of barking squirrels. In my naivete, I thought they might be very small camels braying from the pine woods circling like wagons around my cottage. But I had never heard […]
by Tom Lucas, Metaphysical Dilettante The stars look down upon us and cast their judgment. What is their verdict for you? This can be determined by searching for your birthdate and sign below. Three-headed Wonder (March 1 – March 18): You are one with unsurpassed vision, but this gift has […]
by Leza Cantoral They say they saw little green men on the moon. In the darkness, you can touch yourself but then the lights flash bright and the little green men put cold hard objects into your orifices. They drip milk into your eyes. They fill you with their sperm […]
