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by Tracy Vanity

News of nonstop war and social collapse getting you down? Didn’t know that shit was happening? Doesn’t matter! It’s time to slide on down for a Bizarro News Roundup!

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Halloween-Countdown - Bizarro-News-2014-08-01-02

We did not revert back to the 80’s…well actually some of us never left, but technically it’s 2014 and Weird Al has topped the Billboard charts:

Word Crimes by Weird Al Yankovic

In other music news, Primus are releasing an album of songs from the Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory soundtrack. Here is a taste of what to expect:

In Mexico, there’s an embalmed corpse of a woman who models wedding dresses at a bridal shop. Locals are freaked out but deal with it.

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Corpse Bride, f’real
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  • D.C. hospital rodent infestation is so bad that rodents are crawling up vaginas. That’s pretty bad. Good thing those vaginas were already dead.
  • You no longer need to be a serial killer to have your very own human skin furniture! Looks, feels, and smells like the real thing. Just what you always wanted.
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Until next time Bizarros!